Nine innings 8.8.07

Playing nine innings while wondering how giddy Suzyn Waldman will be if David Wells shows up in Georgie Porgie's private box . . .


1. Watching this Angels series has reminded me how much I enjoyed watching Orlando Cabrera play shortstop for the Red Sox. I realize there are a lot of rumors about why the Sox didn't bring him back, and I have to admit that I thought Edgar Renteria would be an upgrade, at least offensively. But it's downright insulting to think that Sox management dared to descibe Julio Lugo in the same terms that we'd use for Cabrera - dynamic, aggressive, popular in the clubhouse - when there is clearly no similarity between the two players beyond the defensive position they play.

2. Kevin Youkilis was a lot more likable before he decided he should be able to call his own balls and strikes.

3. I realize my hindsight here is sharper than a great hitter's vision, but given that Manny Delcarmen seems to be regressing to his previous inconsistent form while Jermaine Dye is leading the majors in home runs since the All-Star break (11), is it possible that Theo Epstein should have taken White Sox GM Kenny Williams up on what looked like a lopsided trade request at the time? The object, after all, is to win the World Series, and given the ominousness of Papi's shoulder problems, I'm thinking a trade of Delcarmen, Wily Mo Pena, and Craig Hansen for Dye would greatly enhance this team's chances in October without mortgaging too much of the future.

4. He's worthy of endless admiration for what he's overcome, and Fenway will rock with emotion he makes his first home start of the season next week . . . but man, am I wrong to say it's just excruciating to watch Jon Lester pitch? Every time I look up at the TV, it seems like there are two runners on base and he's got a 3-1 count on some bottom-of-the-order schlub. I understand he's probably not at full strength yet, but right now he's the same maddening nibbler who seemed to turn every start into a 4-hour marathon as a rookie. I wonder if the Sox think Clay Buchholz is close to ready.

5. Brief NBA interlude: Reggie Miller, shooting guard, Boston Celtics? Sure, why not? He's one of those blessed shooters who will be able to knock down an open 20-footer on his death bed, he's still in shape and had decent game when he retired two years ago (14.8 ppg), and it will drive Boston-hating Spike Lee over the edge. Given that he'd only be asked to play a dozen minutes or so a game, it seems like a brilliant outside-the-box idea on Danny Ainge's part. I hope it happens.

6. This nightly hissing contest between the Blue Jays and the Yankees has the potential to be the best intra-AL East feud since the Devil Rays were using Brian Daubach for target practice and Ice Williams tried to forcibly remove Pedro's jheri curl a half-decade ago.

7. The Red Sox would be much better served - and their offense would probably be much more productive at the moment - if Tito Francona fined Papi every time he even attempts to slide. You just knew he was going to get hurt on the basepaths at some point.

8. I'm convinced Brandon Moss is going to put up Trot Nixon-like numbers as an everyday big-league player. (And by that I mean Healthy Trot, not Stuffed Full of Crullers and Limping Trot we came to know the past few seasons.) But that day looks very far away right now, doesn't it? I have seen someone in a Sox uniform wear such an obvious deer-in-the-headlights look since Grady Little was patting Pedro on the back and securing his place in infamy one October night at Yankee Stadium.

9. As for today's Completely Random Baseball Card:


"When the Iranians were holding our embassy people captive, instead of the Marines we should have sent Burleson and [Rico] Petrocelli over there. They would have come back in 48 hours with the hostages, the Ayatollah, and a couple million barrels of oil." - Bill Lee

Analyzing Bill James's Red Sox projections, Part 2

Because Dale and Holley are no doubt desperate for a topic to crib for today's show, we're back with some Sox projections from the Bill James Handbook. Today, the pitchers . . .

STARTING ROTATION
Curt Schilling
12-8 3.50 ERA, 177 Ks in 180 innings
Looks like James expects Schilling's age (and girth) to cause him to visit the disabled list once or twice. Given that Schilling has failed to pitch 180 innings only twice since 1996 - in 2003 (broken hand) and 2005 (bloody sock aftermath), I like the odds that he'll throw 200-plus innings and surpass these numbers.

Daisuke Matsuzaka
27-2, 1.33 ERA, 305 Ks in 256 innings, two no-hitters, Cy Young, MVP, World Series MVP, Academy Award winner
Damn, looks like James believes the hype and then some. I guess Dice-K really is going to make us forget all about Pedr . . . oh, all right, I admit it: I made those numbers up. There's no projection for Dice-K, for obvious reasons, though I do think it's worth noting that in his first season stateside, at age 26, Hideo Nomo went 13-6 with 2.54 ERA, whiffing 236 in 191.3 innings while allowing just 124 hits. If Matsuzaka could pitch as well for the Sox as his countryman did for the Dodgers a dozen years ago, I think we'd all be satisfied.

Josh Beckett
13-10, 3.68, 191 Ks in 208 innings
Let's put it this way: If Beckett pitches 208 innings with a 3.68 ERA, he's winning a hell of a lot more than 13 games.

Jonathan Papelbon
14-6, 2.98 ERA, 181 Ks in 184 innings
It's tough to project stats for a closer who's becoming a starter, mostly because the move is so unusual. (John Smoltz is the only recent example who comes immediately to mind.) Still, the numbers seems to favor Papelbon making the transition successfully, and the 14 wins is a comparitively high projection given that James's scale appears conservative; he has no one in either league winning 20 games. For what it's worth, I would not be shocked if Papelbon ended up being the ace of this staff. Does anyone doubt his stuff or his makeup?

Tim Wakefield
8-8 4.14 ERA, 108 Ks in 152 innings.
Wakefield, who turns 41 on August 2, is regarded as a "high injury risk," thus the 152-inning projection. But I have to wonder if that takes into account that he's a knuckleballer, an often ageless specie. Consider: at 40, Phil Niekro threw 342 innings (and went 21-20); Charlie Hough pitched 252 innings; and Tom Candiotti threw 201 innings. If he can avoid another fluke rib injury, I have doubt that Wakefield will devour 200 innings again.

BULLPEN
Joel Pineiro
7-9, 4.50 ERA in 92 Ks in 144 innings.
This one should be disregarded - the numbers are based on Pineiro starting for Seattle, not relieving for Boston. He has looked like he's throwing the ball with some bite lately, so maybe this low-risk move will have some reward, if not necessarily a high one.

Brendan Donnelly
3.41 ERA, 64 Ks in 66 innings
Mark it down: The cantankerous ex-Angel is your opening day closer . . . though you, me, and Tito are hoping the Sox won't need one at all in Kansas City.

Mike Timlin
3.86 ERA, 46 Ks in 70 innings
The nagging strained oblique muscle isn't exactly an encouraging sign that last year's woes are behind him.

Julian Tavarez
4.56 ERA, 43 Ks in 75 innings
I actually get a kick out of Manny's completely insane personal spokesman, though I'd like him more if he didn't accumulate most of his highlights during garbage time.

J.C. Romero
4.40 ERA, 36 Ks, 24 BBs in 44 innings
Twenty-four walks in 44 innings? Yep, this talented hothead is the leader in the clubhouse for the title of Reliever Who Is Going to Have Me Cursing At The TV While Simultaneously Sucker-Punching The Cat. Should be a good time.

Manny Delcarmen
3.88 ERA, 77 Ks in 78 innings
The K-rate is certainly encouraging, and if the pride of Hyde Park can just harness his high-grade stuff a little more often, he could really become an integral part of the bullpen in the late innings. Yes, I'm glad he (and Craig Hansen) were dealbreakers in the rumored Todd Helton swap. (FYI: There is no projection for Hansen.)

Kyle Snyder
4.84 ERA, 51 Ks in 80 innings, 97 hits allowed
The Sox could do worse for a spot starter/mopup man, though I really don't want to see Bronson Arroyo With A Pituitary Problem pitch 80 innings unless half of them are at Pawtucket.

A partridge in a pear tree? What kind of lame gift is that?

Ten free minutes for me, 10 free lords a-leaping for you . . .

1. I don't get why so many words have been wasted on Tom Brady's Pro Bowl "snub." Peyton Manning is having a far better year, Carson Palmer has slightly better numbers, and Philip Rivers has slightly inferior numbers but quarterbacks the league's best team. They are all deserving choices. Granted, Brady has had to deal with more adversity than all of them put together, but I think anyone who his assessing his performance honestly would say this hasn't been one of his best individual seasons. Oh, he's been good, and god forbid we ever find out what life is like without him . . . but for whatever reason, he hasn't been great. Had he been chosen for the Pro Bowl, it would have been based on reputation rather than anything he's accomplished on the field in 2006. Anyway, I can't imagine he gives a damn or pays more than lip-service to the contrived "they're disrespecting us again" angle. Brady's priority has always been a certain other Bowl, the one that matters. (By the way, am I seeing things, or is that a Colts hat he's wearing in that photo?)

2. We should have a better clue as to the legitimacy of the Patriots' postseason aspirations after today's business trip to Jacksonville, where the Jack Del Rio's bipolar Jaguars tend to perform as if they're the '78 Steelers. While today's game is expected to be a street brawl - the Jags like to bring the pain - at least the Patriots aren't going into this one undermanned: My man Mike Reiss's trained eyes tell us that Laurence Maroney and Rodney Harrison appear ready to defy the injury report and play despite their questionable status, and while Vince Wilfork and Ben Watson will be observers rather than participants for the second straight week, there are encouraging signs that this injury-ravaged team is regaining some semblance of health just in time for the playoffs. If only they can just get through this one with a win . . . and no more personnel losses.

3. Two leftover thoughts on the Iverson trade. 1) I give A.I. and George Karl a month, tops, before they are on the verge of re-enacting Sprewell-Carlesimo. They're two of the most stubborn mules in the NBA, and Iverson's reckless/fearless crossover-and-chuck game will quickly offend Karl's Tar Heel sensibilities. 2. It's apparent the Celtics could have put a better package together - Joe Smith, Andre Miller, and two No. 1s is really the best Billy King could do? - but with the flashes Al Jefferson is showing, I'm glad Danny Ainge resisted the temptation. Call me a fool, but I believe in these kids. 3. 'Melo and Iverson together? Now this should be a reality show.

4. A couple of the more prominent stats wizards are predicting a major breakout for Manny Delcarmen next season, based on his improved K/BB rate in '06, and it did seem like he was making significant progress before injuring his hand and losing command of this curveball. It's fair to say he's the most likely of the Sox' unproven cadre young pitchers to contribute immediately next season, and for that reason I hope the rumors are false and he's not the pitcher who would head to the Nationals in a Wily Mo Pena-Chad Cordero swap.

5. If there is one small blessing regarding Paul Pierce's two-week injury hiatus, it's that Doc Rivers will have no choice but to play the electric (if clueless) Gerald Green until The Truth's wobbly wheel is healthy again. Judging by the Sixers debacle, things could get ugly during Pierce's absence, but at least Green will keep it interesting with a SportsCenter highlight or two.

6. File this under Stupidest Damn Thing I've Read All Year, NFL Division. It comes from a recent article by The Associated Press's Dave Goldberg on the Colts' pathetic defense. In attempting to put the six-time On Paper Super Bowl champion's flaws into context, the nation NFL writer for the nation's largest wire service offers this nugget of idiocy:

In the end, it’s just another reason why there are no dominant teams in the NFL and haven’t been for a decade.

I was so stunned when I first read it that I immediately had to read it again, just to make sure I didn't miss an addendum or a qualifier or some friggin' explanation. Something such as, ". . . excluding, of course, the three-time Super Bowl champion New England Patriots, who won 21 consecutive games, 10 straight playoff games, went 34-4 over two seasons, and must be regarded as the first true dynasty since the early '90s Dallas Cowboys." Alas, such a sentence never appeared in Goldberg's article. Weird, huh? He must have hit the delete key by accident or something, because so national football writer would be so brazen or oblivious as to completely disregard the Patriots' accomplishments . . . right?

7. The three best running backs I've ever seen, in order. 1) Earl Campbell (He ran like a pissed-off bull at Pamplona, which is probably why his prime was abbreviated - he took more kill shots than Kevin Faulk.) 2. Walter Payton (My memories of Sweetness remain so vivid, I can't really comprehend that he's been gone seven years now.) 3. LaDainian Tomlinson (If he makes a champion out of an accomplished gagger like Marty Schottenheimer, he immediately ascends to the top of the list.) Honorable mention goes to Bo Jackson, who was the greatest Bosworth-abusing combination of power, speed, charisma, and video-game invincibility we've ever seen, but was gone before you can say "Bo knows hip replacement."

8. It seems you've come to expect an obligatory "The Office" reference, so here's a YouTube clip of a recent Craig Ferguson appearance by the Official Muse of TATB, Wife Excluded. I'm searching for a "now that's a Golden Globes nominee" joke here, but frankly, I'm just not finding it.

9. I've come around on the benefits of this transaction, but it simply cannot be a good omen that J.D. Drew is ready to go on the disabled list before he even signs his contract.

10. As for today's Completely Random Football Card:


I suppose it was a better idea football-wise to bring in that roided-up idiot punter Sauerbrun, but I was hoping the Pats would sign Landeta after working him out this week. The dude is ancient. He's been around so long, he actually played in the USFL, though he really first made his name for dating Donna Rice after the Gary Hart scandal. Told you he was ancient.

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I'm hoping to write during or after today's Pats game, but I have a feeling I may be the designated Christmas Eve Errand Boy in the TATB household. So if we don't cross cyberpaths again until the New Year, I just want to offer my sincerest thanks for making this fly-by-late-night operation something I'm proud of and genuinely enjoy working on. All you readers, emailers, commenters, sportos, motorheads, sluts, bloods, geeks, wasteoids, dweebies, and $*%&heads make it worthwhile. You're all righteous dudes. So happy holidays you and yours, and be careful out there. You never know where Dontrelle Willis might be peeing on a car.

Nine innings: 06.21.06

Playing nine innings while pleased that Coco Crisp is finally doing something besides commercials . . .



1. Reaction to Terry Francona's meeting with the young pitchers to tell them they're going to play an important role from here on out: Please, tell me the next meeting is to tell Seanez and Tavarez that they've been sold to the Hiroshima Carp and have 20 minutes to clean out their damn lockers. Seriously, this is great news, perhaps even a decision that we'll look back on as a turning point in the season. Maybe Manny Delcarmen and Craig Hansen aren't ready to assume crucial set-up roles in the sixth, seventh and eighth innings, and maybe they'll take their lumps. But I happen to think they are ready - Delcarmen fastball is still as straight as a javelin, but he's getting his duck-for-cover curve over for strikes, and that's going to make his life much easier. And while I applaud the Sox for being cautious with Hansen, he already has the second-best stuff in the 'pen behind Goose Papelbon, and the immediate needs of the ballclub should supersede any concerns about his youth or inexperience. And besides, they can't really be any worse than Tavarez and Seanez, both of whom seem to pitch well when the score is 8-1 but are Slocumbesque when the outcome is yet to be determined. While I have been anti-Seanez since his first miserable turn with the Sox, I actually still hold out a shred of hope for Tavarez. Sure, he's a headcase, but he's pitched in key roles for good teams for much of his career, and stuff is still quality, Maybe getting into a low-pressure role will help him recover his confidence. But for now it's time to see what the talented kids will do. I felt like the Sox waited too long to bring up Papelbon last year, and an early arrival may have made the difference between winning the AL East and letting the Yankees have their quaint little celebration on the Fenway lawn. Then again, the Sox's history of prudence with their prospects suggests this: they think Delcarmen and Hansen really are ready. And I'd be remiss if I didn't mention Jon Lester, whose build and motion remind me so much of Bruce Hurst that I almost expect him to show up at the '86 Sox reunion next week. After watching his start against the Braves, I'm convinced he is ready to give the Sox more this season than either a healthy Matt Clement or David Wells would. Kinda fun having real, live pitching prospects for once, isn't it?

2. Tony La Russa's warning proved prescient. Boston, with all of its intense passion, just wasn't the right place for shy Edgar Renteria. And while he was a major disappointment last season - his 30 freakin' errors simply cannot be justified by his being "uncomfortable" - I thought Jerry Remy made a great point the other night when he said he thought Renteria was the smartest every day player the Sox had last season. Renteria did do a lot of the small things well - hell, the 'EEI banshees are still yowling about his daring bunt hit against the Orioles that preceded a Papi walkoff - and while I'm glad he's gone, I regret that, for whatever reason, we didn't get to see him at his best.

3. And speaking of intelligent players . . . If one person has said to me recently that Alex Gonzalez is the best defender they've ever seen play for the Red Sox, than at least a dozen have. I usually offer token resistance - Pokey Reese is the best defender I've ever seen play for anyone - but I certainly understand where they're coming from. Gonzalez seems to produce the spectacular on a nightly basis - I love how he slides to pick a grounder in the hole, then pops up and guns the runner out all in one motion - and he's rock-steady as well. He's glove absolutely makes up for his feeble (but improving) bat. And while we're praising the middle infielders here, this is all I have to say about Alex Cora: Not only is he the smartest player on the team - he's a natural to manage someday - but he might be the best pure utility player the Sox have ever had.

4. Remnants from the Twins whuppin', which suddenly feels like a long time ago: 1) The Twins took a ration of crap from the experts for passing on USC righty Mark Prior to take a local high school catcher with a lower price tag with the No. 1 overall pick a few years back. Joe Mauer is making them look pretty shrewd now, isn't he? 2) I wish I got to watch Johan Santana on a regular basis. What a treat. Not only can he overpower hitters, but he seems to take a cruel joy in making them look foolish with his ridiculous changeup. He reminds me of Pedro in his heyday. 3) Few Sox fans probably were familiar with him before this series, but trust me in my minor-league obsessed dorkiness when I say there's no shame in getting beaten by Jason Kubel. He was one of the best prospects in baseball two years ago before blowing out his knee, and even after missing an entire season, he remains the second-best prospect in the Minnesota system behind future Cy Young Award winner Francisco Liriano. (Whom someone should do a decent book about, by the way.) We may not have heard much about Kubel before this series, but good health willing, we'll be hearing about him for years to come.


5. Kyle Snyder looks like what the stork might deliver nine months after Bronson Arroyo hooked up with Big Bird.

6. Take away my Old-School Credentials if you must, but National League baseball? You can keep it. Give me the designated hitter, the rudimentary strategies, the mighty sluggers and the cowering pitchers. Just spare me from watching Curt Schilling try to squeeze his XXL head into an XL helmet, or seeing John Smoltz pop up a bunt to stunt one more attempted rally, or suffering all the wannabe La Russas pulling off double switches and using 42 different pitchers to get through the last three innings.

7. Verrry interesting listening to John Smoltz say during a taped interview in the Sunday night Sox-Braves game that he'd be open to a trade if it "were for the betterment of the Braves organization." I've always thought Smoltz was pretty classy (and not in the Ron Burgundy sort of way), but his comments seemed like a disingenuous way of saying, "Get me the hell off this sinking ship." Poor Smoltzie might miss the playoffs for, what, the first time in 16 years? Rough life, man. That said, if he really is available, you better believe he'd be at the top of my Red Sox Wish List, ahead of Dontrelle Willis (if he's healthy at 30, I'll be shocked), Jason Schmidt (if he's healthy in September, I'll be shocked), and pretty much any other available starter. I imagine Yankees fans would say the same thing, which could set up a hell of a bidding war.


8. I'm happy for 'Toine, who earned his championship ring with a disciplined (for him) 11-rebound effort last night. I'm happy for Dwyane Wade, who I do not hesitate to say is one of the finest and most likeable all-around basketball players I've ever seen. And I'm happy for Shaq, if only because he won without the Ego Twins, Kobe and Phil. But anyone who watched these Finals and is not disgusted by how slanted the refereeing was toward the Miami Heat is either A) Pat Riley, B) One of David Stern's scriptwriters. I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but when you see Wade falling to the ground without being touched or Shaq plowing into his defender's breadbasket and getting the call again and again and again, and then you remember that Mark Cuban's name is atop Stern's enemies list, well, you have to wonder if the outcome would be different were the court actually level.

9. As for today's Completely Random Baseball Card:



He's 70 years old, and I'm pretty sure he could still kick every one of his players' asses. Especially Soriano's.

Nine innings: 06.12.06

Playing nine innings while wondering why Varitek didn't pinch-hit for Mirabelli . . .



1. Just when you're ready to wonder if David Ortiz is only human after all, just when you're beginning to think that .260-something batting average is proof that The Shift is his Kryptonite, just when you're sure you're witnessing the first prolonged slump of his Red Sox career, he takes one mighty swing, answers your 2-year old daughter's innocent, daddy-prodded request to "Hit a home run, Big Happy," and turns certain defeat into one more exhilarating victory. Rangers, 4-2? Make that Red Sox, 5-4. Really, what more is there to say that hasn't already been said? The walkoff homer was the fifth he's hit in a regular season game (and I believe the seventh overall, though I think I'll soon go watch "Faith Rewarded" just to be sure), and damned if it doesn't feel like the 25th. I've said it before, and I'm sure I'll say it again: David Ortiz is the best thing to ever happen to the Boston Red Sox. God bless Big Happy.

2. C'mon, don't chicken out now, Jason Grimsley. It's not like you have a legacy to protect, and you're already in the baseball witness protection program from here on out anyway. So keep naming names, and then name some more. And then maybe those players you finger as steroid abusers, HGH freaks and world-class cheaters and frauds will name names, and so on and so on and so on, and before long, we'll finally have the full story about who did what and who was sticking a needle where during this, the Steroid Era. And then, and only then, will we be able to put everything in perspective - the records, the accomplishments, the size of Barry Bonds's head. At last we'll know just how rampant performance-enhancing drug use was/is in baseball, and with the goddamn truth finally having been told, there will be no more bombshells to disrupt the game and steal the headlines every few weeks. I suspect you think you'd be hurting the game to reveal what was going on behind locker room doors. Funny, because with the right dose of courage, you might just end up saving it.

3. Is Josh Beckett is the real-life Nuke LaLoosh? I'm not certain, but I'm pretty sure I saw him trying to breathe through his eyelids during the fifth inning. Actually, all things considered - and with my enormous expectations for him tempered for the moment - you have to consider today's start progress for the ridiculously gifted, ridiculously stubborn 25-year-old righthander. He resisted the urge to try to throw every pitch at 120 mph, spotted his top-shelf curveball with more precision, and while the velocity on his changeup is still too high (at 89 mph, it's the equivalent of a Keith Foulke fastball), he seemed to have made the conscious effort to pitch rather than just throw. He caught the Rangers hitters off-guard a couple of times by throwing breaking stuff when he had two strikes - Hank Blalock looked especially foolish in the first inning - and it was apparent that the scouting report said, "Sit on his fastball with two strikes." Now, this isn't to say that I'm abandoning my conspiracy theory from the other day: I still believe the Blue Jays and Yankees picked up on a hitch or a quirk in his delivery to let them know exactly what pitch was coming. Well, either that or Varitek was sick of being shaken off all the time and told the hitters what to expect, a la Crash Davis when Nuke got too big for his garter belt. You know, come to think of it, Varitek is said to be a big "Bull Durham" fan . . . and the hitter in that scene was NESN's own Paul Devlin . . . hmmm, I might just be onto something here . . . (slipping tinfoil hat back on) . . .

4. Just when I was starting to think that his stellar performance against the Yankees was the aberration and his stint in Boston would ultimately be little more than a cameo, David Pauley settled down after a gruesome start and allowed just one run over his final three innings tonight. The Sox farmed him out after the game - to Pawtucket, a step up from where he was two weeks ago - but I don't think we've seen the last of him, and I certainly hope he'll be back. Despite the homely 7.88 ERA, he showed enough to warrant legitimate prospect status - an old-school curveball, a sneaky two-seamer that cuts back across the outside corner, a darting sinker. And there was something endearing about the way he carried himself upon realizing the dream. He managed to come across as both poised and nervous as hell, and he seemed legitimately awed during the New York game when Big Papi sat down and draped his massive arm around him as if to say "Welcome to the bigs, kid. You belong." While you wish he threw just a little harder, I like what I saw for the most part in terms of ability and demeanor. I'm rooting for him.

5. While Pauley heads down I-95 with three big-league starts and no big-league victories to his credit, Manny Delcarmen finally picked up his first career win as the beneficiary of Papi's Game 1 bomb. Like Pauley, Delcarmen is another one who's impossible not to like - he's the local kid, smiles easily, and has the raw skills to someday be a lights-out power reliever, especially if he can continue to improve his command. You have to be happy for him for achieving his milestone today. I was glad the Sox resisted the Indians' demands to include him in the Coco Crisp deal, and I hope Francona continues to give him a shot to show his stuff, because while he probably won't earn too many more victories as long as he's a reliever, he has a chance to help this team win a lot of games, and perhaps soon.

6. Am I the only one who heard Sox executive Mike Dee on WEEI trying to charm his way through Saturday's rain-delay disaster and wondering if he struts around humming Beastie Boys tunes: "I'm Mike Dee and I get respect . . ." I am the only one, aren't I? Dammit, I hate it when I'm the weirdo in the room.

7. Regarding that Cleveland trade: Andy Marte is hitting .259 with 4 homers in Triple A (looks like sly ol' Schuerholz knew exactly what he was doing), Guillermo Mota has a 7.82 ERA, and Kelly Shoppach lost his backup job to journeyman Tim Laker. Even though Crisp and David Riske are only now beginning to contribute, you'd have to say the deal is tilted toward the Sox so far.

8. In case you missed it, Gabe Kapler went 2 for 5 in his first rehab game in Portland today. Not that I'm suggesting the Sox should rush him back into his familiar fourth outfielder role or anything, but I'm pretty sure he'd contribute more playing with a torn Achilles' tendon in one leg and a wooden peg for his other leg than Willie Harris and Dustan Mohr would with four healthy wheels between them.

9. As for today's Completely Random Baseball Card:



Can you believe the Sox couldn't manage one measly homer off him? We didn't get to yell "Way back!" even once. What a letdown.

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(Quick programming note: You might have noticed that, for the first time in several months, I turned the post "comments" back on. I did so for four reasons. 1) Blogger has made them much easier to moderate, and you know how I'm a control freak. 2) Haloscan offers a commenting system that doesn't require you to sign up for anything. 3) I always like hearing from you pencil necks, geeks and damn fools, and since I've been overwhelmed with email lately, I figured it would be an additional way to let you have your say. 4) My wife nagged me to do it. So there you go. Feel free to post in the comments or to continue to email me, and as always, play nice. We're a PG-rated site. Okay, PG-13. Of course, if I get that "Brokeback Mountain" photoshop featuring Jeter and Damon again, all bets are off . . . - TATB Management)