Friday, July 29, 2005

Just Manny being . . .



We here at TATB are on record as wholeheartedly digging the Manny Ramirez experience. As if that goofy banner atop the page wasn't enough of a giveaway, he's probably our all-time favorite player not named Clell Lavern Hobson Jr.

So it pains us to admit that what the Sox slugger pulled Wednesday afternoon in Tampa Bay was possibly the most disheartening decision by a Red Sox since Carl Everett chose Family Day to conk an umpire.

His shorthanded team, united by their exhausting, exhilarating, and damn near tragic victory the previous evening, desperately needed him to sacrifice his pre-approved day off to pick up the slack for injured teammate Trot Nixon.

So what does Manny do? He declines, calling in . . . tired? Sore? Indifferent?

Even those of us who think Manny doesn't get his due in this town (mostly from the lowest common denominator, the talk-radio banshees, admittedly) cannot offer a defense for him today. It was utterly inexcusable, mind-bogglingly clueless, beyond the realm of everyday selfishness. I can't imagine being more disappointed in a player.

Computer issues are making us antsy about writing at any length tonight - I've lost enough type to fill an entire edition of TATB The Magazine - and besides, I surely can't articulate it as well as Gordon Edes did in Thursday's Globe.

But we promise to weigh in further on Manny's Day Of Rest during a special weekend edition of Nine Innings. Be sure to check back in. Hopefully by then, Manny will have shaken off his bad case of the Wednesdays, forgotten that he asked to be traded,, and deigned to take his usual place in the lineup. Hopefully.

As for today's Completely Random Baseball Card:



(Not only do we here at TATB believe this to be Manny's 1991 class photo from his senior year at George Washington High School in the Bronx, but we also think we've uncovered the yearbook info that accompanied the picture . . .)

MANUEL ARISTEDES RAMIREZ

Nicknames
"Manny"
"Yo, Manny"
"Where The --- Is That ---- Ramirez, The ----- Game Starts In Five Minutes"


Activities
Varsity Baseball (Grades 7, 8, 9,10,11,12 captain); Varsity Football (11,12); John Stamos Fan Club (11, 12 president); Debate Team (9, 10, 11, 12 captain).

Honors
Voted Most Likely To Succeed, Best Athlete, Best Hair, Class Clown, Least Dependable, and Most Likely To Drive In Runners In Scoring Position With Less Than Two Out.

Favorite quotes
"Baseball has been berry, berry good to me." - Chico Escuela
"I like big butts and I cannot lie. All you other brothers can't deny." - Sir Mix-A-Lot
"What, me worry?" - Alfred E. Newman

Favorite memories
You know, man . . . it was, you know, all good, man. Baseball was, you know, good, man, and watching "Full House" all those times was good, man - Uncle Jesse rules, man!!! - and, you know . . . DEBATE TEAM STATE CHAMPS, MAN! YEAH!

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